Right Kind of Wrong is book 3 in the Decadent series, by Elaine White. Right Kind of Wrong continues the tale of Konnor’s relationship with Grayson, but the main focus is Tam and how his life had turned out, since his relationship with Konnor fell apart.
Tam’s done everything he can to forget about Konnor and their disastrous relationship. His new boyfriend, Giovanni, has helped with that. But six months into their relationship, he discovers that he’s fallen into the same trap all over again.
Beaten, broken and falling to pieces emotionally, Tam wonders if there’s any point in going on. A pair of copper eyes and a gentle smile rescue him, in his darkest hour, giving him a ray of hope. But then he discovers that this beautiful boy is related to Grayson, the new boyfriend of his ex.
Finally finding ‘the one’ in an unusually compassionate stranger, what possible future can they have, when Tam knows that Konnor will do all in his power to keep him far from the Dashwood boy?
*This extract is unedited and subject to change, before publication*
There wasn’t much point sticking around, if Tam was just going to fight him. He let out a deep breath and turned away.
“Don’t go,” Tam protested, in a rush. He caught his hand and pulled him back, until they were face to face.
“Why should I stay?”
“I,” He stopped there, standing open mouthed, unable to say the words.
He fancied him. He wanted to kiss him. He wanted to do more than kiss him. Those feelings weren’t wrong and if anyone should have trouble with them, it should be him. Casen had spent his whole life believing he was straight and that it would never change.
Direct action was needed; if he couldn’t encourage Tam to speak up with words, then maybe actions would do it.
Casen stepped up close, until they were a breath apart and pressed his hands to Tam’s chest. He was so tall; a foot taller than him, broad and muscled. There was a big difference between them. Casen was barely five-foot-five, while Tam was in the six feet marker, but he didn’t care; their differences made him feel safe. He knew that nothing could hurt him, because Tam wouldn’t let it.
It didn’t matter if it made sense. All that mattered was the solid bond that was between them, that even he couldn’t explain. It was magnetic, chemical, emotional and unfathomable, but it enveloped him in the most enticing warmth.
He let his hands travel up that broad chest and around Tam’s shoulders, as he finally looked up and met his gaze. He looked so scared that it forced him to look away.
Casen pressed his forehead against Tam’s chest, trying to get his thoughts in order. This close, all he wanted to do was kiss him from dawn ’til dusk and explore every inch of him. That wouldn’t help them right now. Tam had been hurt by too many people, who wanted him for how he looked or what he could do in the bedroom. He needed to know that Casen wanted more; that there was more than that drawing them together.
“I’ve never wanted to kiss another guy. I’ve never even looked at a man the way I look at you, but it goes beyond a physical attraction,” he promised, finally lifting his head to meet that confused stare. “Can’t you see that?” he asked quietly, hoping to find out what he was thinking.
“Say it,” Casen begged him. The only way he would get past his nerves was to say it out loud. He had to say that he wanted him, that he cared for him, that he was different to everyone else Tam had ever wanted or cared about.
“I can’t,” Tam protested, with real terror in his eyes.
“Why not?” he asked quietly, not even angry that he couldn’t get the words out. It only proved that too many people had screwed with his head.
Casen decided, there then, that he would be the one to fix that. He would show Tam that he wasn’t worthless.
“Because…you don’t understand,” Tam got angry and pushed him away, backing off a few steps. He ran his hands over his face and up into his hair, as if he was at his wits end.
“Make me understand. Help me to understand,” he asked.
Casen wanted to beg and plead with him, to give him a shake and let him see into his mind, to see for himself how he felt. He couldn’t do any of that. Tam needed to work this out on his own.
“I can’t,” Tam insisted, shaking his head.
“You keep saying that, but what does it mean?”
“We…we barely know each other,” he argued, as if that was a reason to keep them apart. It wasn’t.
A good reason would be that Tam wasn’t fighting for them, the way he was. He wasn’t the only one scared shitless; Casen was terrified of what he felt. It was so new and unfamiliar, but he trusted himself and he trusted Tam.
This was frightening, sudden and it messed with his head, because he’d never even considered that he might not be straight. He should be the one freaking out and showing resistance, but he couldn’t do it. Every time he saw that look in Tam’s eyes, that said he was at breaking point and ready to crack, something inside him rose to the surface, ready to protect him.
How he could protect a guy twice his build was beyond him, but he hoped that the things Tam needed protection from weren’t physical. Casen could shield him from the bad stuff; he could be an invisible force field, fighting the negativity from his head and heart, if Tam would let him.
He needed to at least try it, before making a decision. Even if the physical stuff was impossible, if he couldn’t bring himself to try it or if he didn’t enjoy it, he didn’t care. He would still want to be with Tam. Something inside said that Tam would want to be with him, too.
If Tam couldn’t fight for them, then he had no right to his affection.
“Tell me straight, with no lies;” Casen asked, crossing the distance between them.
Tam took a half step back, clearly wanting to run. He visibly forced himself to stand still and wait, his chest heaving with his ragged, nervous breaths.
“Do you want to kiss me right now?” Casen asked, taking a grip of the front of his shirt, to make sure he didn’t run. “Before you speak, you should know that if you say anything other than yes, I won’t give you this chance again,” he warned him.
He wouldn’t be the only one fighting for them. He wouldn’t face up to Mack, Grayson and Konnor by himself; he couldn’t. It was unfair to ask it of him.
“I’m willing to fight for what I want. To fight to make you see what I see. If you won’t meet me halfway, then what’s the point of trying?” Casen asked, letting him know that he was about to reach his limit.